It is a well-known fact that many consumers are baffled by technology and don't understand jargon.

But spare a thought for the customer service advisors dealing with the complete computer novice; they have to deal with some very peculiar phonecalls.

A survey of the calls received by BT’s Home IT advisors reveals some IT issues that have left this specialist advice team scratching their heads.

To bring a smile to your face, the telecoms giant has just released a list of its top ten quirkiest calls.

Anthony Vollmer, head of home IT propositions at BT, said: “Some of the calls we get from customers have certainly raised a smile, as you can see from the examples here. What they highlight is a real demand for a service like BT Home IT Advisor.

Here is the company's top ten:

Customer: “My 14 year-old son has put a password on my computer and I can’t get in."
Advisor: “Has he forgotten it?”
Customer: “No he just won’t tell me it because I’ve grounded him.”

Advisor: “Press any key to continue.”
Customer: “I can’t find the ‘Any’ key.”

Advisor: “Can you click on ‘My Computer’?”
Customer: “I don’t have your computer, just mine.”

Advisor: “You have spyware on your machine, which is causing the problem.”
Customer: “Spyware? Can they see me getting dressed through the monitor?”

Customer: “My mouse mat isn’t wired up”
Advisor: “I’m not sure I understand, your mouse mat shouldn’t have any wires.”
Customer: “well how does it know where my mouse is? Is it wireless?”

Customer: “I keep getting inappropriate pop-ups on my computer and don’t want my wife to think that it’s me.”
Advisor: “I will remove them for you.”
Customer: “How do I get them back when she is not in?”

Customer: “I met a man on the internet, can you give me his phone number?”

Customer: “How do I change channel on my monitor?”
Advisor: “Your monitor won’t have channels like a TV.”
Customer: “But I was watching the internet channel the other day and now I just get the word processing channel.”